I have been clean with zero relapse of street opioids for over four years now...I got clean and was completely sober for 120 days while I was covertly organizing my exit from the state.
One thing that people don't think about enough is the problems that are caused by being FORCED to engage in an environment TEEMING with junkies who are still using.
Many patients on methadone use it simply as a way to stay well when they can't afford to use - or if there is a bust and a dry spell. These patients are the ones who make the rest of us look bad- and they don't give a flying F*ck if they're making it harder for the rest of us!
Junkies aren't all created equal- some of us never would have ended up using illicitly at ALL if we had not had the misfortune of being invited into the world of narcotics to begin with....I was on pain management after I went into multiple organ failure and nearly DIED. I spent six months admitted to a long-haul ward on the top floor so I was in a location they could assure I would be safe and accounted for due to having dialysis three times a week for 180 days.
By the time that the DEA decided to make us all criminals in 2016- I was cut off COLD TURKEY and ended up going to the streets after I nearly DIED trying to come off of the drugs.
It lead to five more years of serious street abuse- I was having problems with epilepsy from a head trauma in 2009 and I was getting horrendous headaches on the right side of my head....I had grand mal seizures intermittently because of withdrawals.
I quit for good after I left the state- my mum needed help so we moved intogether. I literally left everything behind me- and I was in the process of divorcing my asshole ex. I never went back to the state again- and I think that's WHY I was successful at staying clean.
It was also due to the Bupenorphine. At first I was on Suboxone- and I was developing heart palpitations, I had sores up and down my throat and In my soft tissues in my mouth so badly I was losing weight. I also had constant hot and cold sweats- and the pain was excruciating- it was worse than if I had simply stuck with ibuprofen. I showed the doctor and he immediately switched me to Bupenorphine- and it's very effective, but basically impossible to obtain unless you're pregnant or have a severe allergy- like I developed.
After I moved to NM- It took me months to find a satisfactory physician who was not going to attempt to punish me for asinine personal bigotry...The first MD I had in NM did that- he tried to force me to taper off and told me that there was no Physiological adequete need which justified my continued medication and when I refused to discontinue it- he outright called me a lazy junkie...I walked out..& I called and filed a grievance- he was subsequently fired.
Long term maintainence is the ONLY way to be successful. Back when Suboxone was released in 2002- the intention was a SHORT round of 10 days and that was literally ALL you could detox for....it took years for it to make redetermination for chronic ongoing treatment.
Even so- the worst harassment and malicious antics I receive is ALWAYS from chronic pain patients who sneer at me that I am "stealing medicine from someone who ACTUALLY needs it!"- They insist that I should be forced to endure the excruciating pain from the brain tumor and the others in the right side of my head- That I allegedly should be "taught a lesson" by being tortured to stroke their nonexistant, laughable superiority.
That kind of behavior is absolutely deplorable. Particularly from the CPP... At this point - absolutely 0 people (besides my mum) that know me IRL know that I take IV Bupenorphine...if they found out- I'm pretty certain my home would be burglarized and they my meds would be ripped off as I get shot in the kneecap.
The streets are going to be hella bloody if they keep cutting people off of legal regimen. What needs to happen at this point to stabilize things? Because it seems like the governments everywhere are outright simply trying to torture people to death and drive them to die faster- in misery and hate.
I have been clean with zero relapse of street opioids for over four years now...I got clean and was completely sober for 120 days while I was covertly organizing my exit from the state.
One thing that people don't think about enough is the problems that are caused by being FORCED to engage in an environment TEEMING with junkies who are still using.
Many patients on methadone use it simply as a way to stay well when they can't afford to use - or if there is a bust and a dry spell. These patients are the ones who make the rest of us look bad- and they don't give a flying F*ck if they're making it harder for the rest of us!
Junkies aren't all created equal- some of us never would have ended up using illicitly at ALL if we had not had the misfortune of being invited into the world of narcotics to begin with....I was on pain management after I went into multiple organ failure and nearly DIED. I spent six months admitted to a long-haul ward on the top floor so I was in a location they could assure I would be safe and accounted for due to having dialysis three times a week for 180 days.
By the time that the DEA decided to make us all criminals in 2016- I was cut off COLD TURKEY and ended up going to the streets after I nearly DIED trying to come off of the drugs.
It lead to five more years of serious street abuse- I was having problems with epilepsy from a head trauma in 2009 and I was getting horrendous headaches on the right side of my head....I had grand mal seizures intermittently because of withdrawals.
I quit for good after I left the state- my mum needed help so we moved intogether. I literally left everything behind me- and I was in the process of divorcing my asshole ex. I never went back to the state again- and I think that's WHY I was successful at staying clean.
It was also due to the Bupenorphine. At first I was on Suboxone- and I was developing heart palpitations, I had sores up and down my throat and In my soft tissues in my mouth so badly I was losing weight. I also had constant hot and cold sweats- and the pain was excruciating- it was worse than if I had simply stuck with ibuprofen. I showed the doctor and he immediately switched me to Bupenorphine- and it's very effective, but basically impossible to obtain unless you're pregnant or have a severe allergy- like I developed.
After I moved to NM- It took me months to find a satisfactory physician who was not going to attempt to punish me for asinine personal bigotry...The first MD I had in NM did that- he tried to force me to taper off and told me that there was no Physiological adequete need which justified my continued medication and when I refused to discontinue it- he outright called me a lazy junkie...I walked out..& I called and filed a grievance- he was subsequently fired.
Long term maintainence is the ONLY way to be successful. Back when Suboxone was released in 2002- the intention was a SHORT round of 10 days and that was literally ALL you could detox for....it took years for it to make redetermination for chronic ongoing treatment.
Even so- the worst harassment and malicious antics I receive is ALWAYS from chronic pain patients who sneer at me that I am "stealing medicine from someone who ACTUALLY needs it!"- They insist that I should be forced to endure the excruciating pain from the brain tumor and the others in the right side of my head- That I allegedly should be "taught a lesson" by being tortured to stroke their nonexistant, laughable superiority.
That kind of behavior is absolutely deplorable. Particularly from the CPP... At this point - absolutely 0 people (besides my mum) that know me IRL know that I take IV Bupenorphine...if they found out- I'm pretty certain my home would be burglarized and they my meds would be ripped off as I get shot in the kneecap.
The streets are going to be hella bloody if they keep cutting people off of legal regimen. What needs to happen at this point to stabilize things? Because it seems like the governments everywhere are outright simply trying to torture people to death and drive them to die faster- in misery and hate.